Thursday, September 20, 2012

Meet Obama's Celebrity "Pledges" !

Supporting the president by swearing to vote for him by scrawling slogans on your hands in black marker.  Yeah, I'm vomit out of my eyeballs.

The Obama campaign has made these three his "bottom bitches" in their latest attempt to re-invigorate the  cult-of-personality presidential campaign.  Let's take a look at them, shall we?

Scarlett Johansson:

Earned: $20 million for "Avengers 2"
Quote that can be taken as an analogy:: “Hi, we've just gotten into a car accident, um, we're way in Disneyland Drive.”
What she thinks of her fellow Americans:  I do think on some basic level we are animals and by instinct we kind of breed accordingly.

Jessica Alba:

Why she voted for Barack Obama? - My theory is that if you look confident you can pull off anything -- even if you have no clue what you're doing.
On politics:   I do movies for you. Practice safe sex and drive hybrids if you can.
Did you know? Jessica Alba is a racist!  "...Mexicans just spread all their seeds. And the women just pop them out.”

Natalie Portman:

Net worth: $32 million
Why she's a vegetarian:  My dad's a doctor, and when I was 8, I went to one of his medical conferences where they were demonstrating laser surgery on a chicken. I was so mad that a chicken had to die, I never ate meat again.
Fortunately, it's only Magic Marker:  I'm a Gemini, so I change my mind every day.

Natalie's best movie moment, which she'd do well to remember:

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