Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Barack Obama SOTU: "Investing" Us Into Bankruptcy

We've known since last weekend - but still finding it shocking - that Barack Obama is going to tout more government spending in his State of the Union address later this evening. Shocking, as it is most likely the last thing the American people want, save for further enhancement of ObamaCare.

But Obama, ideologue to the end, cares not a whit for the will of the great unwashed he poses to champion. He's going to drive the car right over the cliff, and take us - his passengers - with him.

Certainly Barack knows that that to champion increased government spending will have the pitchforks glowing outside the capital by speech's end. Fortunately, he leads a nation of dolts, dullards, and the disinterested, so a smart guy like him can fool chumps like us with half his brain tied behind his back.

Apparently - in a brazen stroke of unoriginality - he's going to label his call for increased spending as "investments", so that the rabble only thinks "increased returns".
Rich Lowery rightly mocks the president for this weak sleight of hand/mouth:

President Obama hopes to be saved by a euphemism.

He is wagering on the power of the word "investment." It sounds so market oriented and cutting edge in contrast to its more pedestrian, politically fraught synonym, "spending," especially the toxic "deficit spending" that, to this point, has defined Obama's presidency.

The focus on "investment" is nothing new. Obama already had leaned heavily on one of the hoariest Democratic tropes. When he signed the stimulus bill in February 2009, he used the word "invest" or "investment" 15 times in a 2,000-word speech. A casual listener might have been hard-pressed to understand that any new government spending was involved at all, what with all the "critical investments...."

It seems as if Barack Obama, Supergenius, has learned all he needs to know about the presidency from watching a Simpsons episode entitled "Bart to the Future". In a terrifying glimpse of things to come, Lisa Simpson is the first straight female president of the United States, and is faced with a crippling budget deficit. Surrounded by advisers, she discusses
how to best make the American people swallow her bitter pill:

If I'm going to bail the country out, I'll have to raise taxes, but in my speech I'd like to avoid calling it a, "painful emergency tax."

What about, "colossal salary-grab?"

See, that has the same problem. We need to soften the blow.

Well, if you just want to out-and-out lie ...
[pause, while Lisa doesn't object] Okay, we could call it a, "temporary refund adjustment."

Lisa: I love it.

[Later, Lisa is on TV, speaking from the Oval office]

My fellow Americans and voting illegal aliens, I will not mince words. Your country needs you. That's why today I'm proposing a temporary refund adjustment.

And here's the reaction that Obama expects to get tomorrow night:

Refund adjustment? Hey, sounds good to me.

Sure beats a tax.

We love you, President Simpson!

Alas for Barack, we are all not Lennys, Carls, and Moes. No matter how hard he (and his ilk in the media) desperately wish we were...

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