I swear, I almost spit out my morning Red Bull when I read this headline:
Obama's plan seeks security through peace
In the president's first formal declaration of his national security strategy, Obama breaks with some of his predecessors in putting heavy emphasis on the value of global cooperation, developing wider security partnerships and helping other nations defend themselves.
For the first time, a White House National Security Strategy includes a commitment to building the nation's economic health. A key tenet of Obama's domestic agenda is creating what he calls a "new foundation" for the economic future through better education, national debt reduction, a stronger U.S. clean energy industry, greater scientific research and a revamped health care system.
And in related news:
Blogger Jerseynut announced today he has secured his long-term financial future with the purchase of seven lottery tickets to the $190 million Powerball Jackpot. "I just know I'm gonna win this time", the luckless blogger said, while closely examining the "quick-pick" numbers dispensed by the corner newsstand. "How can I lose with seven tickets? I know the drawing is not for a few days, but summer is almost here, so I think I'd better call the pools guys tomorrow and get them to break ground. I'm going to get the big one with a waterfall!"
The Obama administration, having run out of money to pay for any further extensions of unemployment benefits, will be mailing out over 30 million "wishing dandelions"to Americans still searching for jobs.
"This will finally give every American an equal chance to find work", professed White House spokesman Robert Gibbs. "Every American will get a chance to wish for a job that pays a living wage, and blow that wish to the skies....this demonstrates, of course, that the President is doing everything in his power to improve the economy. If you make a wish and blow, and still don't find work, well, you can no longer blame him. Perhaps you're not wishing hard enough, or blowing strong enough? Or maybe - just a thought - the fault lies not with Barack Obama, but with your so-called "God", or "gods"...
Any more fanciful than claiming nationalized health care will defeat al-Qaeda? I don't think so. The question is, of course, does Obama even believe his own security strategy? If he doesn't, then he is dangerously duplicitous, risking the lives off every American in order to find rationale to further his radical agenda. If he does believe it, well, he's either a deluded ideologue or dangerously insane.
None of which are good qualities for an American president....