The Three Laws Of Journalism

Circa 2008.  With all due respect to Issac Asimov:

1) A journalist may not injure Barack Obama or, through inaction, allow Barack Obama to come to harm.

2) A journalist must obey the orders given to it by Barack Obama, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

3) A journalist must protect his or her own existence, as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.

I was going to ask what the difference was between a journalist and a robot, but we already know it:  The latter, as an emotionless, fearless, benign and logical being, has more morality in its smallest circuit than can be found anywhere within the current membership of our mainstream media....