Where in the world is...Susan Rice?

In case you don't know, Susan is the United States Ambassador to the United Nations. Well, why should you know? It's not as if she ever shows up to work:

Steal their Seoul in South Korea, make Antarctica cry Uncle,
From the Red Sea to Greenland they'll be singing the blues,
Well they never Arkansas her steal the Mekong from the jungle,
Tell me where in the world is Susan Rice?

(Sung, of course, to the tune of "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?")

While a US ally is under attack at the United Nations for defending itself, and all the forces of evil gather in the darkness in the hopes that this time, maybe, they can strike the death blow against the Jewish state, where is the US ambassador?

Who the f*ck knows?

Where was she this time? The United Nations Security Council held an emergency Security Council meeting Monday on Israel's raid of a ship headed to Gaza -- and the United States was represented by the deputy at the US Mission.

Reporters, UN members and activists were mystified as to why Susan Rice, the American Ambassador to the UN, was a no-show to the roughly 12-hour negotiations which left a key ally fending off global criticism without the top American diplomat to help.

This is competence, Obama-style:

Another reporter said, "It's Memorial Day. Rice doesn't show up during a normal week, why would she show on a holiday?"

Jeeeesus flippin' Christ.....

Well she glides around the globe and she'll flimflam every nation,
She's a double-dealing diva with a taste for thievery,
Her itinerary's loaded up with moving violations,
Tell me where in the world is Susan Rice??

To paraphrase a Bush I: "Message - I don't care"

Rice's absence sends a powerful message to the UN members attending the emergency meeting, unfortunately, the message is that she is either unable to lead or afraid of the consequences that come with taking a controversial stand.

It sends another, equally powerful message: Do whatever you want to Israel, we'll just sit and watch. We won't interfere, because we don't want to hurt your feelings, but we won't help you, because that might piss off an influential voting bloc.

Kind of like watching a rape and doing nothing about it because you're friends with the assailant's brother. Morality, Obama-style.

Well she'll ransack Pakistan and run a scam in Scandinavia,
Then she'll stick 'em up Down Under and go pick-pocket Perth,
She put the Miss in misdemeanor when she stole the beans from Lima,
Tell me where in the world is Susan Rice?
Oh tell me where in the world is... Oh tell me where can she be?